What Is Grooming?

Grooming is when a person builds trust and emotional connection with a child (or their family) to prepare them for sexual abuse. It’s a deliberate and manipulative process used to gain access, reduce suspicion, and keep the child silent.

Grooming can happen in person or online. It often starts with attention, kindness, or gifts—but it's really about breaking down boundaries so the abuser can exploit the child without getting caught.

Common Grooming Behaviors

Here are some warning signs of grooming to watch for:

1. Gaining Trust

• Being extra kind, helpful, or protective

• Becoming close with the child’s family to lower suspicion

2. Special Attention

• Giving gifts, money, or privileges

• Treating the child as “more mature” or their “favorite”

3. Isolation

• Encouraging secrets and private communication

• Pulling the child away from peers, parents, or safe adults

4. Testing Boundaries

• Starting with non-sexual touches like hugs or tickling

• Making inappropriate jokes or “accidental” touches

5. Desensitizing to Sexual Content

• Showing the child sexual images or talking about sex

• Asking questions about their body or development

6. Creating Secrecy

• Saying things like “This is our little secret”

• Making the child feel special or guilty for telling

7. Manipulation and Threats

• Using guilt, shame, or fear to keep the child silent

• Saying no one will believe them or they'll get in trouble